NOVEL III.
Friar Rinaldo has an affair with a lady in the neighbourhood, and he makes the husband believe that he is busy about a charm to cure their child of the worms.
Filostrato having ended, Eliza was now ordered to speak, which she did as follows: – Emilia’s conjuring down the spirit now brings to my mind another conjuring story, which, though it may not be equal to hers, yet, as I can think of no other, I shall relate it.
There lived at Siena a very agreeable young man, of a good family, called Rinaldo, who had long been in love with a beautiful lady, the wife of a wealthy neighbour. He was of opinion, that if he could contrive to speak with the lady without exciting suspicion, he should obtain what he desired. Finding no other opportunity, and the lady being big with child, he resolved to stand godfather. Accordingly, he ingratiated himself with the husband, made the proposal in the handsomest terms he could devise, and was accepted. Rinaldo, having thus become Madonna Agnesa’s gossip, had the desired opportunity to declare to her in words the passion she had long before read in his eyes; but his soft speeches availed him little, though the lady did not appear displeased at hearing them. Some time after, whatever was the reason, Rinaldo turned friar, and, whether that kind of life was to his liking or not, he persevered in it. For a while he seemed to have laid aside his love for the lady, and other little vanities, yet ere long he was the same person again, affecting an extraordinary elegance in his dress, making ballads and love-songs, and indulging in all sorts of mundane diversions.
But why am I so particular about this friar? Are they not all of the same stamp? Alas! to the scandal of a dissolute world, they are not ashamed to appear plump and ruddy, with their garments fine and delicate, whilst they walk along the streets, not like dov^s, so much as high-crested cocks: and what is worse (not to mention their chambers being filled with pots of rich conserves, perfumes, and other costly compositions, with bottles of fine distilled waters and oils, with vessels also of malmsey, and the best Greek wines, so that you would take them for a perfumer’s or a druggist’s shop), they are not ashamed, I say, to have it known they are gouty; supposing us to be so ignorant, as to imagine that abstinence and a coarse diet do not make people less corpulent and more healthful; or that constant fasting and prayer should not cause them to be pale and out of order: and as if we had never heard that St. Dominic and St. Francis thought themselves well clothed when they had one suit of coarse russet cloth to keep out the cold, without ever thinking of so many changes of fine apparel for mere show only, and which the simple credulous multitude is obliged to pay for.
Our friar then, falling into his former way of living, began to renew his suit more briskly than ever to this lady, who, thinking him perhaps more agreeable than before, did not much withstand it. One day, when he was very pressing, she answered him as those do who are not very loath to comply. “What! ” She said, “do friars give their minds to such things?” – “Madam,” he replied, “take but my habit off, and you will find I am like other men.” The lady, laughing on one side of her mouth, and looking demure on the other, said, “I low can I do such a thing? You know you stood godfather to my son, and therefore it would be a terrible sin, otherwise I am sure I should be willing to oblige you.” – “My dear gossip, don’t be a goose,” said the friar. I do not deny that it is a sort of a sin, but God pardons greater ones on repentance. Tell me pray, which of the two is more nearly related to your son, I who held him at the font, or your husband who begot him?” – “My husband, of course.” – “Very well,” says the friar, ” and does not your husband lie with you? Then by consequence you may lie with me who am not so nearly related to your son as he.” The lady, who was no great logician, was satisfied with this argument, or appeared to be so. “Who could withstand such convincing words as yours?” She said, and without making any more pother about their spiritual relationship, she let him do as he had a mind. Nor was this the only time, for the title of godfather gave them many opportunities of being together.
One day among the rest, Rinaldo went to visit her, and finding nobody with her besides a servant maid, he sent his companion with the girl into a pigeon-loft to teach her some prayers, whilst he and the lady, with a little infant of her’s, went into the chamber, and locked themselves in. They had not been there a very long time before the husband came home unexpectedly, and was knocking at the chamber door, and calling to her to open it, before they were aware of his return. Madonna Agnesa was frightened to death, and said, “What shall I do? my husband is here, and will now find out the cause of our acquaintance.” The friar having his cloak and hood off, replied, “Had I but my clothes on, we could find an excuse; but if you open the door, and he finds me in this manner, we shall both be ruined.” – “Then,” said she, “put on your clothes instantly, and when you have done so, take our child in your arms, attend to what I shall say, to make our words agree with mine, and leave the rest to me.” Now calling to her husband, who continued knocking at the door, she said, “I am coming.” Accordingly she went to let him in, and putting on a cheerful countenance, she said, “Husband, it was the greatest blessing in the world that Friar Rinaldo happened to be here today, for otherwise we had certainly lost our child. “The husband was ready to faint away, and inquired how it happened? “The boy,” quoth she, “had a fit, and I knew not what to do, when the friar luckily came in, and taking the child in his arms, he said, “Madam, it is owing to worms which lie at his heart, and would soon kill him; but, be not afraid, I will charm and destroy them all, so that before I leave kim he shall be as well as ever.” Now as we wanted you to say some prayers, and the maid did not know where to find you, he sent his friend to the top of the house to say them in your stead; whilst we shut ourselves up in this chamber, as nobody could be present at such a mystery besides the mother. He has the child now in his arms, and only waits till his friend has made an end to conclude the whole process, for the child has come to himself already.” The honest man, who, out of his great love for his child, was far from suspecting such a trick, fetched a deep sigh, and said, “I will go and see him.” – “By no means,” she replied, “for that will spoil the whole thing; but stay, I will see first if you may be admitted, and then call you.” The friar, who heard the contrivance, was now dressed, and, having the child in his arms, and everything in readiness, he called out, “Madam, is not that your husband?” – “Yes,” answered he, ” I am here.” – “Then come hither,” quoth he, “and behold your son, whom I thought you would never more have seen alive. Take him, and in return make a statue of wax of the same bigness to the honour of St. Ambrose, through whose merits you have received this extraordinary favour.”
The child, seeing his father, showed several little signs of fondness, whilst he received him with as much joy and wonder as if he had been raised from the dead, returning great thanks to the friar for what he had done. The companion, also, hearing all that had passed, came down into the chamber, and said, “I have gone through all the prayers you ordered me to repeat.” Friar Rinaldo replied, “Brother, you have done well, and you see by our joint endeavours the child is recovered.” The honest man on this treated them both with wine and sweetmeats, and they took their leave with great respect. And immediately he set about making the waxen image, and sent it to be set up with several others before the image of St. Ambrose; but not St. Ambrose of Milan.